When talking to my boyfriend, I accidentally summed up obsessive-compulsive disorder in one sentence. With the addition of one word, here’s what I said:
“OCD is daily, multiple life or death decisions.”
If that sounds exhausting, that’s because it is. It’s trying to decide, “Is this thing worth dying for? Nope, I’m going wash my hands… again….”
“Is it worth it to touch this?”
“Is it worth it to shake someone’s hand?”
“Is it worth risking my life?”
All day, every day.
OCD thrives on the “What if?” question. Sure, we know it’s highly unlikely that we’ll die from shaking someone’s hand. We know the odds are extremely low that touching dust will cause us to contract a rare disease. We are not in a state of psychosis (“a collection of symptoms that affect the mind, where there has been some loss of contact with reality”1). While there can be overlap, and a person with OCD can experience psychosis, the vast majority of people with OCD recognize that their thoughts and compulsions are intrusive.2 They are driven more by anxiety, fear, and self-doubt, and they understand that the feelings that compel them are irrational and unwelcome. Alternately, during psychosis, a person may struggle to be able to tell the difference between what is real and what is not.
We’ve seen just enough “evidence”, just enough weird news to keep us wondering, “But what if…?” We think, “Sure, most people might not experience the worst-case scenario, but what if I’m the unlucky one who experiences that worst-case scenario?!”
Worrying never changed anything. We know. But, what if…?
Disclaimer: This is not medical advice, nor am I a medical professional. I write based off of my experiences and corroborate some of my thoughts with articles found on the internet. However, please do not make any life-altering decisions based on what you read here. Do your own research, and especially, please talk to a medical professional (e.g., a medical doctor, a psychotherapist). OCD can be debilitating. It’s okay to get help!
Chronic in the Midwest 